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Takeaway from my wedding photography experience

We were looking for something “photojournalistic”.
jigg and I told our photographer that we wanted our wedding photo album to have a “photojournalistic feel” to it – pictures that are unsuspecting and spontaneous, and shots that capture events in mid-action because we felt that those were the type of pictures that told the best stories.

We didn’t care for picture perfect portraits.
Portraits can be very striking and powerful with the proper subject, pose, angle, lighting, etc.  But neither jigg nor I are models – jigg cannot naturally smile in front of a camera and I’m just awkward. We also didn’t have the time to pause and strike a pose during our reception to create this faux picture perfect moment either.  The thought of us standing still with smiles frozen on our faces as guests line up to get a picture with us was also just too dreadful for us to go through with.

Fancy lens effects were not a selling point.
I’m somewhat convinced that the most common ones can be recreated through Photoshop.  Fisheye effect?  Check.  Panoramic effect?  Check.  Bokeh effect?  Check.  [I apologize to my photographer friends who may be aghast by this handling of photography, but honestly, the average person wouldn’t be able tell the difference.]

What cannot be recreated in Photoshop is the raw stuff.  No fancy camera lens or photo editing program can replace a skilled photographer’s eye for awesome pictures.

Of course, these are just our personal preferences.  But there are also a couple of general things anyone can take note from based on our personal experience, advice from our photographer and other married couples, and the knowledge of hindsight.

Even a blind squirrel can find a nut sometimes.
Most photographers can produce a couple of amazing photos in every shoot. For example, if a photographer took a thousand pictures at a wedding, if he’s any way half-decent, at least one would turn out amazing.  And that’s the picture that you’d see in his portfolio.  It’s a numbers game.  But you’re not looking for 0.1% success rate.  So ask to review the complete album from several completed shoots to see if all the pictures consistently meet your expectations.

Your wedding album isn’t really that big of a deal as you think it will be.
Sure, the pictures document a momentous event and help you relive those moments every time you look at them.  But the truth is, you’re not going to look at these pictures again for a long, long, long time.  You may hang a couple of them around the house, but your wedding album will sit mostly unforgotten along with your baby pictures and high school year book until you chance upon it during a spring cleaning many springs later.  Seriously, I don’t know any couple who looks at their wedding album on a regular basis.

Nobody wants to sit there and look at all 1,000 images from your wedding album.
Except maybe your mother.  No body else cares that much.  People do it either because they’re being polite or because they’re flipping through to see if they’re in any of the pictures. So please don’t entertain your guest with a one hour slideshow of your wedding.  I’ve sat through something like this and I will never wish this upon anyone.

So 10-20 of your favorite  images would do.

Photographs by www.JMitchelPhotography.com.

We go together like…

We go togther like xia jaio and shumai

We go togther like xia jaio and shumai. Because sometimes peanut butter and jelly, peas and carrots, mac and cheese, and milk and cookies do get sick of each other.

Philosophy on how to raise kids

Although jigg and I don’t plan on having children for a while, we have already began formulating our united strategy on how to raise our kids.  We’ve discussed everything from Western versus Eastern style of parenting (Read Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mom) to what the most advantageous month of the year is to give birth (Read Outliers).

I believe that kids learn to manipulate people and situations to their advantage from an early age.  For example, babies know crying gets them attention, so they learn to fake cry to get more attention even if nothing is wrong.  Or they purposely misbehave to get things their way.  This is something jigg and I are determined not to let our kids win at.

I learned alot from observing other people’s parenting.  For example, my mother in law was babysitting our one and a half year old nephew this past week.  The little brat already figured out how to walk all over her!  We kept telling her that she needs to be stern when reprimanding him and NOT smile or give him a hug immediately after.  But she doesn’t listen, and as a result, our nephew just ignores her every time she tries to discipline him.  Or he cries when he doesn’t get things his way.

We were at a family BBQ over the weekend and our aunt was telling us how hard it was to feed her three-year old grandson sometimes – because the child needs to be coaxed during meals to swallow his food. Upon hearing this, jigg and I both suspected that the child knows he will get extra attention from NOT eating, so he does it on purpose!

jigg: If the kid doesn’t want to eat, then stop force feeding him! I’m sure if he’s hungry, he’d eat whatever you give him.

Aunt: I don’t have the heart to do that.  What if the kid starves?!

jigg: I’m sure he’d come to you or cry to get your attention when he’s hungry.

Aunt: Kids sometimes don’t know these things! It’s unsettling to even let him get hungry.  When you have kids of your own, you’d understand.

jigg: A kid who doesn’t know when he’s hungry – that’s just crazy!  That’s basic instincts.  Even animals know this.  If my kid doesn’t know how to cry when he’s hungry, then he deserves to starve…

This went on for a good five minutes until the Aunt concluded that young couples like us just don’t understand. I told jigg that I want to be a Tiger Mom and be absolutely strict with our kids, but he called BS and said I’d turn into a marshmallow.

Dealing with jigg’s obsessive personality

jigg has a problem with doing things in moderation when it comes to things he likes. Once he gets into something, it’s next to impossible to pull him away. I understand that everyone has hobbies and things he/she likes to do, but jigg just takes something as innocent as reading a book or eating an orange to resemble a drug addition. Below are examples of some of his past/current obsessions.

Book series: It’s not like I don’t want jigg to read, I just don’t appreciate him reading every waking moment of the day that a book being the third person in our relationship. I’d find him with the book on the train, after dinner, in the bathroom, before he goes to bed, when he wakes up in the morning, and any other time he isn’t sleeping, working, or eating. The worst part is that all the books he likes happen to be 10+ part series.

Oranges: We bought a box of four dozen oranges over Chinese New Year. jigg managed to finish the box by himself in one week and got himself an ulcer. The same can be said about watermelons, soy sauce, and ketchup, but these things haven’t given him an ulcer yet.

Juicy by Notorious BIG: jigg would start rapping this song out of nowhere ALL the time – in the shower, on the train, on the streets, while brushing his teeth, etc. etc. I hear this song so often, even I know the opening lyrics to it.

WWJD #4: What would jigg do to win an inane argument?

I didn't even realize we were arguing?

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